When I tell people I’m working towards being able to teach Sacred Pregnancy retreats, I’m usually met with the look – the one full of skepticism, the one that says “Oh… you’re one of "those" doulas, with their hippy woo-woo science! Are you a Sherpa too?!”
Common misconception – I’m not a Sherpa or a three month old baby! However, I am pretty passionate about women experiencing the kind of birth day they envision, and that just might mean taking the time to connect to yourself and the little one your body is working so hard to help grow.
I know I’m guilty of this – I rarely take time to address, honor or mark the milestones in my life. Sometimes, this takes a toll on me! It can feel like all of these important events are flying by and my journey seems to be going far too quickly. Sacred Pregnancy is about slowing down, appreciating the little (and big!) changes your body is going through and honoring this transitional time in your life.
A Sacred Pregnancy retreat will teach you to take time for yourself – even if it’s 5 minutes a day. It outlines the importance of meditation and journaling to connect to yourself and your baby and create a sacred space for reflection. It will also encourage you to take a serious look at the expectations you hold surrounding pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Women will get all kinds of pregnancy and birth messages from the time they are a young girl until the step onto the pregnancy, birth and motherhood path. Are the expectations you have realistic? Are they serving you in a positive way? Some of these messages are healthy, good and empowering, but most from society at large are not. It’s important for us to look at our expectations and where they come from, or at least where do we think they came from. It’s also especially important to know that every birth story is a normal birth story. It’s your journey; it’s your life lesson.
Sacred Pregnancy is connection, is facing and forgiving your fears, is honoring the body that is growing an extension of love, is sisterhood. It’s growing your circle. It’s learning to change – because you are changing! Motherhood is a journey and pregnancy is just the beginning – so slow down when you can, you deserve to celebrate it!
The story of your birth told from your mom:
Dominic Boire - your father
Barbara Sriver - primary midwife
Jenna Craig- second midwife
Sonya Duffee - Doula extraordinaire
Around 11:30 pm on Sunday April 24th, I went to the bathroom and noticed I had lost part of my mucous plug and some amniotic fluid. Shortly thereafter I began to have contractions. Around 1:30 I woke up your father and told him. My contractions we already 6 minutes apart 45 seconds in length. I texted both our doula Sonya and midwife Barb.
Sonya agreed to come over in the morning. Around 5:30am, having not slept that great dad and I figured it would be good for me to have something to eat and just rest. I was instructed oatmeal would be a good choice. I ate a bowl and went back to bed. Not even 10 minutes after I laid down, I felt the desire to vomit. I sprung out of bed trying to make it to the bathroom and I vomited everywhere! Carpet, curtains, bedspread, pillows. Nothing was safe. Your dad was so great and took it like a champ and got everything cleaned up. I went back to bed to rest until Sonya arrived.
She said Barbara would come and check on us later in the afternoon if things don't progress before then.
Dad and I did end up going to see the midwife Barbara at her office around 4pm. We were still having some contractions. She checked my blood pressure and it was good. She also measured my belly and measured from my pubic bone to the top of my uterus. It was 37.5cm which was larger than the week before. I was surprised by this because you had dropped a lot and started to make a lot of room, your bum was no longer at the top and your feet were no longer kicking me in the ribs. While we're at the midwife she mentioned there is a drink that we could drink that will help start labour's intensity. We had to go and pick up one of the needed ingredients at the Italian centre nearby. As soon as we got home we made it and then I drank it around 5:30pm when we got home. I also tried to eat some almonds and drink water. I wasn't able to keep any food or anything down, but the drink did have some protein in it, so I was grateful for that. As Barb had predicted the contractions started again around 6.30pm. Dad was starting to get pretty concerned and uncomfortable and the contractions were starting to get closer and closer. Dom did contact Sonya for here to come over to provide some support.
When Dom originally contacted her she was actually out getting groceries and would come over right afterwards. She managed to come around 7.30pm and the contractions where about 45 seconds long and just under 5 minutes apart. We all stayed in the living room and worked on having the contractions there. While we're at the midwife office dad noticed a birthing stool and asked if we could borrow, which I'm really grateful we got it because I used it a lot as the contractions progressed. I would sit on the stool and the rest my head on a yoga ball. Just after 8pm my water broke while I was on the stool. Good thing we had towels under the stool. Water continued to gush out for the next 20 minutes. I went to the washroom as during the birthing process my body cleaned itself out. When I got back to the living room I vomited into a bowl the concoction taken to help progress the birth, this was now around 8.30pm. We stayed upstairs until Barb came over as the contractions were getting more intense and closer together.
Barb showed up closer to 9pm. We brought everything we had in the living room down stairs and we continued down there for about 30 minutes before we started to fill the birthing tub for me to go in. I really enjoyed the birthing tub as it reduced the pressure, I was mostly on my hands and knees and your dad would put pressure on my lower back during the contractions. I started to feel like I wanted to push so Barb check my cervix to make sure it was fully dilated so that I could start to push. Turns out cervix was only 3 to 4 cm dilated and you had turned sunny side up and were really far back towards my back.
I'll be really honest with you when Barb told me this my heart sank and I wanted to quit. I wanted to go to the hospital and get some medical intervention. Luckily Barb had a pretty frank conversation with me and I had a decision to make on what I need to do next, with the support of the team I decided to continue and stay strong. Bard told me that I would need to eventually get out of the tub and onto the bed so that I could lay in a position that would help you turn into proper position. That is what we did, the contractions were getting stronger and closer together, they were about 1.5 minutes apart and 45 seconds long. I was really amazed with myself because somehow I managed to relax through these really intense contractions and you eventually helped me and turned into proper position. My cervix also became fully dilated and it was around 10 pm.
I went back into the pool to go and push you out. I laid really low and had my hands up on the side of the pool for support, you dad was at my head holding my hands and reading the positive affirmation we had hung up in the room. Barb kept on checking me and the progress I was making. Around 10.30pm I actually felt you head as you were almost ready to come out. This gave me a second wind and the energy to finish and get to hold you in my arms. By 11 pm you were really close and Barb could see your head getting ready to come out and by 11.37 you were born. You head came out on one contraction and we waited for your shoulders to come out on the contraction after that.
Barb passed you through my legs under water into you Dad’s arms and then I quickly grabbed you. I then laid my my back against the tub and held you skin to skin. I eventually looked to see if you were a boy or a girls. It took you a little bit of time before you started to breathe and make noise. Barb continued rub you back and eventually you started to make noises, but we could tell you still had stuff in your lungs. It took several minutes before you were screaming and it was clear most of your lungs were clear.
Turns out your dad's prediction was right and you were a boy. Your dad actually thought you were going to be a baby boy before I even took a pregnancy test. He also picked you name when I was about 15 weeks pregnant. Throughout the night your dad was keeping your Aunty Dawn and Grandma posted on the progress of the birth so that they could pray for us that everything goes well. Turns out your mom let your great Grandma Boire know and she contacted the nuns in Toronto to pray for us. Your dad was also having a texting battle with Grandma Sharon because she thought you were going to be a girl. By you being a boy your dad was given two bottles of port, one from Papa Ron and the second from Uncle Dustin.
Back to your birth story... Eventually the umbilical cord stopped throbbing and your dad cut it. I kept you on my chest for a little while and just really enjoyed holding you, I was still in a state of shock and overwhelmed by what my body had just experienced. But it was pretty clear in your dad's eyes how much he loved you and was excited to touch you. I then transitioned into starting to be time to deliver the placenta so you dad got to hold you while I did that. He was pretty excited and got to really connect with you, when he held you, you started to calm down and breathe better. He got to experience your skin change color change to a nice healthy pink color. Even though I did want him too he brought you for a quick tour of the house as he got some more towels for me.
I was a little jealous how he was able to hold you for so long while I was delivering the placenta. I was really struggling with it and we tried many different things. We started in the tub, then moved to the shower and then finally to the bed and it still wasn't coming out. While I was on the bed I did get to hold you while I tried to breast feed you. You latched on right away and I was so grateful.
Eventually while I was on the bed the placenta did come out. Turns out it was the biggest placenta the midwives had ever seen, that's why I think it took so long to come out. I gave you back to your dad while I went for a shower and cleaned up. While in the shower I passed several large blood clots, when I was done I went back to bed and Barb stitched me back up for a smaller tear I had on my left side. It seemed like everything that hurts happened on my left side with my pregnancy with you, I had hip issues, I was sore on my left. It was the side that your back was on, my right side was the one that would get abused by you kicking it all the time.
After Barb was done stitching me up your dad and her measured your head which was 35cm around and your length which was 20.75 inches long and your weight which you were 9 lbs and 1 ounce. I then got to hold you and tried to breast keep you again as the midwife gave your vitamin K shot. The midwifes needed to fill out some paper work and Sonya cleaned up and by 3am every one was gone and your dad and I and you slept in the basement for the night. We tried just butting you in a crib beside the bed but you wouldn't settle down and kept on letting out two cries and then stop. Your dad wasn't going to be able to sleep with that so he grabbed you but two blankets around you and but you between him and I. You the quickly fell asleep and slept until 10am. Your dad and I were really grateful when they how calm of a baby you are and how well you slept, we could talk right beside you and you slept like a champ.
Later that day you got to meet your Grandma Sharon and Papa Ron and then your sister Lily and Jon and Steph. Barb also stopped by to see how you are doing and answer any questions your dad and I had. The next day you got to meet your Pere Don and memere Collette and talk on the phone to your Auntie dawn who gave some helpful advice to dad and I.
Midwives Jenna Craig, Barbara Schriver and your Dad looking on your weight
Special thank you for sharing your birth story with us
Past Full Circle client, Megan Boire whose doula was Sonya.
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