My boys are 6 and 3 and they have endless energy (until the 4pm-until-bedtime madness where they lose all sanity and can't even lift their own arms let alone clean up any toys or get their pjs from upstairs). I am ALWAYS looking for ideas for adventures... a new park we've never been to, where to get fancy ice cream, anything.
Now, if we've ever chatted about social media before, then you know how I wish the whole world used only instagram and that everyone was required to post twice a day... and every month, at least 3 of your posts would need to be unfiltered and real (like your kids crying or your burnt toast all scraped off because it was the last piece of bread and you didn't pick up the groceries yet). I love Instagram. My feed consists of tattoo artists, crazy hair, National Geographic and shark pictures, some celebrities, my friends, and perhaps most importantly, local mamas who reach out to other mamas in a variety of different ways.

If you're new to the Edmonton area, if you're a new parent, or if you just want some cool, inspiring, interesting new people to follow, then this is the post for you!


@edmontonmama – Lori used to be Frugal Edmonton Mama... she would clip coupons and search for deals and share her knowledge with the world. If you head over to her page (Facebook, instagram, and website), you'll see that she's not about that anymore. She's about adventure and experiences, not “stuff”. I love this. Also, her instagram stories help us all feel normal with regards to parenting... meltdowns in the car, ordering from Skip the Dishes... again, being awake at 4am with a little one who just decided to be awake.


@raisingedmonton – This is my go-to for finding out about different playgrounds, things going on around the city, new restaurants to take kids to, weekend adventure ideas, etc. Right now, these guys are posting videos of different playgrounds in and around Edmonton... such a cool idea!


@albertamamas – Alberta Mamas has just recently been launched and it is a group of local ladies who have gotten together to share their experiences and ideas for travelling... with kiddos! Great blogs so far and I'm so excited for more from these lovelies.


@edmontonschild – This is a very well know magazine that is published a few times a year but their website is always up to date with the kid-friendly goings on in Edmonton. Again, Instagram love for this one... memes and local event information.


@deanneferguson – Miss Deanne is responsible for all of those fun things you see happening in malls and sometimes at the Callingwood Farmers Market... Box Social Events are monthly pop-up activities for kids and families (and sometimes even just mamas). Her instagram profile has a link to the Box Social website where you'll find a calendar of all of her events. So fun! She also posts photos for “cocktail Monday” with her hubby and their creations always look super tasty.


@bitchinhousewife – Yoga instructor, kambutcha-makin', healthy eating mama. Jen is all kinds of inspiring and uplifting. She has made me want to eat (and even sometimes drink) green things. Now that is powerful.


Most of these I've listed are also on Facebook under the same names... some you may need to do a google search for their websites. Like I've said, big fan of Instagram so that's always my go-to, but Facebook is great for letting me know when there are new blog posts and such.

​          How did anyone ever know what to do before the internet?!?! 

​Just kidding... my kids and I actually went old school recently and drove around aimlessly a few times last week. We came upon a cool little lookout on some wetlands. They still talk about the ducks and the geese and the little black bird we saw while we were out there... experiences, friends. Go. Have them.

Thanks to the lovely Marci Terpsma, this informative blog post was possible! Marci is a Registered Massage Therapist, instructor, and owner at Revive Health and Wellness in Beaumont, Alberta. She is now offering infant massage classes with Full Circle Birth Collective every few months. Check out our Infant Massage page under the classes tab to find out when our next class is offered. 

What is Baby Massage and How Does It Work?

 Massage will empower the connection you already have with your baby.

TOUCH – this is the simplest form of communication. "Massaging your baby communicates love, releases tension and helps you better understand your baby’s needs,” Vimala McClure, Infant Massage

The first communication a baby receives and the first language of its development, is through the skin.

How does it work? What happens when you massage a baby?

Massage involves 2 types of responses:

Mechanical response – the result of pressure and movement as soft tissues are manipulated

Reflex response – occurs when the nerves respond to stimulation

There are 4 main categories massage effects on the human body – in this case for infants:

Stimulation, Relief, Interaction and Development, and Relaxation

​STIMULATION

 Nervous System and Brain Development – The sensory stimulation of massage may speed up the rate of myelination of the brain and nervous system. This process is incomplete at birth. Skin stimulation (massage) can speed this up “enhancing rapid neural-cell firing” thereby improving brain/body communication (McClure). 

 Immune System – massage stimulates nerves in the brain that facilitate nutrient absorption and lower stress hormones. This results in improved immune system functioning.

 Respiration – The rate of breathing can be regulated or enhanced with massage. This happens as the massage calms and relaxes the baby and the surrounding musculature. The parasympathetic nervous system is stimulated to respond and release calming hormones, such as oxytocin and dopamine, into the blood.

 Circulation – Massage moves things including blood and lymph. Certain strokes can warm up the feet and increase overall circulation, which leads to a better functioning immune system. It can decrease blood pressure due to the dilatation of capillaries and decrease heart rate simply due to relaxation.

 Digestion and Excretion – Specific strokes can create movement in the large intestine by increasing peristalsis. Massage will help the baby to relax and experience a decrease in pain, all of which, allow for more effective digestion.

RELIEF

 regular massage can help to relieve pain or discomfort from:
o Gas
o Constipation
o Teething
o Congestion
o Emotional stress

INTERACTION AND DEVELOPMENT

 Massage can help to increase bonding between any parent or caregiver and the child. This is very intimate, one on one time spent with the baby. Parents learn to read their baby’s cues and to respect them. It teaches them how to stop, observe, and then proceed as opposed to a quick reaction. A new parent gains confidence as they understand their baby and trust their instincts.

​
RELAXATION

 The most obvious response to massage is relaxation. Touch can settle a fussy baby, calm an outraged toddler or calm and overstimulated child. Regular massage seems to help babies become more tolerant to stressful situations. While stress is a natural part of our lives, infants are not always able to benefit from it as much as they could. There is growing evidence that cortisol levels in babies who are massaged on a regular basis, with a predictable pattern of massage strokes, are lower than babies who are not massaged. As well, the positive hormones like dopamine and serotonin increase.

There have also been studies showing the mother’s hormone levels are positively affected by massaging her baby. These include increased levels of the “love” hormones oxytocin and prolactin. This, in turn, may have an influence on her feelings of success as a mother, breastfeeding and even post-partum depression.

We hope you found this post informative!

I LOVE FOOD. So why not post about some of my go-to's. Often I stress over the next meal because I don't know what's in the pantry and fridge but know we need nutritious meals to keep our active family going. I hope these ideas help a few families out with some new ideas, or simply an idea for tonight.

 These recipes are a few of my favourites for various reasons. I am very conscious of what my kids consume, especially after a few potty training regressions with my almost 5 years old!!!! She was sooooo difficult to poop train and the challenges return at almost 5 years old when she decides to turn super picky and only eat what she likes (cheese, pasta, bread, cheerios). So….here are some of my attempts to get more fibre into our diet and throw together last minute meals when we're so busy making memories.

Mini quiche
I keep little tart shells in my freezer for those lunch time rushes that I’m not sure what to make!
 
 Ingredients:

• 2-3 Eggs
• 1 cup Milk
• Cheese
• Small tart shells
• Salt & pepper
• Veggies (peppers, broccoli, spinach work well)
• Ham (optional)

 
Directions:

1. Heat oven to 375. Place ready-made tart shells on a baking sheet.
2. In a medium bowl, add eggs, milk, salt & pepper. Mix with a mixer or whisk.
3. Place ingredients of choice in the tart shells
4. Pour egg mixture into tart shells.
5. Bake for 20 minutes or until egg is fully cooked.
6. Let cool and enjoy warm or cold! 

​Nutritious & creamy “Pudding”
I like this recipe for breakfast because I find it so filling. It’s also great for “dessert” or snack!
 
Ingredients:

• 3/4 cup Greek Yogurt
• 1 tbsp natural peanut butter
• ½ ripe banana, mashed with a fork
• 1 tsp cocoa powder
• 1 tbsp chia seeds or hemp seeds (optional)

 
Directions: Combine all ingredients and mix well. If I add chia seeds I let the mixture sit for 5 minutes before eating. If you want “ice cream”, place your mixture in the freezer for 5-20 minutes to get the desired consistency.

Oven Roasted ribs
This recipe is super easy and delicious. We used to use rib rub but found the littles were hyper sensitive to the “spice”. Now I was salt & herbs!
 
Ingredients:

• Pork Back ribs
• Salt
• Herbs  

 

Directions:

1. Heat oven to 325 Degrees F.
2. Season rack of ribs with herbs and seasoning of your choice. I like to use basil oregano, and seasoning salt or Herbamare (herb salt)
3. Wrap ribs completely in tinfoil and place on baking sheet.
4. Cook for 3 hours or until they “fall apart”
5. Let rest for 5 minutes and serve. 

One of my favourite memories of visits with my midwife was her casualty about everything. When we started getting closer to baby's arrival time, I would tell her something new or that something had changed in my body, and she'd do this big happy smile and say something along the lines of, "awesome!" or "Oooh cool!". 

Simple. That was it. Your body is doing exactly what it needs to do. So how 'bout them Oilers? Did you get that Costco trip done yet?

My midwife taught me this as a new-to-be-mother, and now as a doula it's one of the essential things I try to teach my clients. Early labour? Ignore it ☺️

Now by no means do we mean, "Don't pay attention to your body." But what we are saying is don't hyper-focus on all the things. I find this is especially hard to tell a first time mama. It's a common question for them, "But how will I know if I'm in labour," "How will I know when it's time?" ... My sweet girl, I promise you, when things are active... you will know.

Early labour can take a long time. For some women a couple hours, for many women even longer, I'll even go as far to say as a couple days. It's all beautiful, it ALL counts. Every surge, every wave of pressure, every cramp and uncomfortable sensation.. whether it's a Braxton Hicks or a "real" contraction, I don't care, it all counts. 

The trick is: don't count it. Don't count it until you can't not count it. I promise you, it will eventually turn in to that.  The more you can convince yourself that you're not in labour, the shorter your labour will seem. You'll cope better, truly.

The way I explain it to women is as if you're about to get your period. You're a day or so away, PMS is creeping in, you start to get sore breasts, and a little crampy. Do you go home, refuse to go out, sort out all your tampons and pads on your bathroom counter and wait? Do you cancel your dinner plans or say "screw it!" to your grocery list because you're period will be here in a few days? I mean, that would be nice to retreat in and shut out the world, haha! but nope. You take note of your body, you might swing by the store and pick up a box of pads or Motrin for later... but otherwise you go about your day, grumpy and all!

So do this when you're going to have your baby. This is a process your body is designed to do. It knows exactly what it needs to do, and when to do it. Your job is to find the balance between keeping your brain busy and out of the way, and your body moving but also well rested. 

Collect some projects for yourself to do for when early labour starts. I've had clients save their wedding photos to scrapbook, dog park trips, a list of baking to do, book yourself a pedicure, go to the movies. Get out! Because the way you stub your toe at home in front of your partner is not the same way you stub your toe in the middle of the line at Starbucks. 

You are strong, you are capable. Your body is wise, your baby is cute and has their perfect timing planned. The more we have you "just rolling with it" ... the easier it's going to roll out.

Learn more about Vanessa by clicking here.

Postpartum Sitz Bath
Link

In a mason jar, I combined:

¼ cup Comfrey Leaf
½ cup Lavender Flowers (mmm, my favourite scent!)
¼ cup Plantain Leaf
½ cup Red Raspberry Leaf (this makes great tea as well)
¼ cup Yarrow Flower
¼ cup Calendula Flowers
¼ cup Shepherd’s Purse
¼ cup Ova Ursi Leaf
¼ cup Epsom Salts or Sea Salt

After all ingredients were added I sealed the mason jar and put it in my handy, ‘After Childbirth Healing’ bin in my bathroom. I made sure to put some Muslin Bags in the bin as well so that I could skip straining the herbs from the bathtub and instead just soak with them. 

​According to Wellness Mama, this mixture can also be used in a peri-bottle to reduce any stinging that may occur during urination after childbirth (if you have any tearing or episiotomy, but also just to help with healing) and diluted for use around your baby’s umbilical cord as it dries.

With how simple the Sitz Bath recipe was, we then decided to try our hands making some Baby Oil as well.

Baby Oil
Link: This link lists several natural baby care items you can make! I will eventually be trying my hands at almost all (if not all) of them. Today, I will only be making the baby oil.

Warning: As always, before the first application of ANY kind of oil on your baby’s skin, put a drop on their arm to make sure your baby is not allergic to the oil. If you choose to use an oil other than one listed below, please research to make sure that the oil you have chosen is safe for your baby’s skin. Again, please check with your primary care provider if you have any questions or concerns about what may or may not be unsafe for your baby.

Ingredients:

1 cup Olive Oil or Apricot Oil
2 tablespoons Calendula Flowers
2 tablespoons Chamomile Flowers

For this recipe I decided to use Sweet Almond Oil instead of Olive or Apricot Oil. Sweet Almond Oil is highly nourishing and contains high level of Vitamins A, B2, B6 and Vitamin E. Mostly because I already had it in my pantry.

There are two methods of creating the oil that are recommended by Wellness Mama. One is a fast infusion, which involves heating the oil with the Calendula and Chamomile Flowers mixed in.

I am only 17 weeks pregnant and I have some time to kill before my baby gets here, so I opted to try the slow infusion method. This involves putting the oil and flowers in a mason jar and sealing it, shaking daily, for 6-8 weeks prior to use.

​ 
I plan to create quite a few DIY postpartum and baby products. This is going to be a great money saving endeavor, and I find it very comforting knowing exactly what ingredients are in the things I will be putting on my body and on my baby.

Over the next few months I will be sharing more DIY recipes that you may want to try for yourself and your baby. You can follow along with my posts to see the recipes as I create them, or feel free to visit the Wellness Mama website and do it on your own!

These recipes were taken from https://www.wellnessmama.com,
​check out her website for more great DIY recipes! 

You walk into a room where a newborn sleeps, and her presence fills up the room!
Whether it’s our species’ genes celebrating their eternal life through another generation; our mammalian compulsion to care for the helpless young; or simply that a baby is pure love incarnate,
there’s no denying the magic of birth – we humans are natural-born baby-worshippers! Their newly-forged spirits shine brightly, and we sense something so special about this new being.
 
The ancient Celts talked of thin places – places where the barrier is thin between heaven and earth. Samhain is a time when the veil is thin between the worlds. Birthing time is one of those special, thin times, too – the veil is thin as baby crosses over into this world.[1]
 Poet William Wordsworth describes newborns: “trailing clouds of glory do we come… Heaven lies about us in our infancy“
 It’s hard to believe! A year ago, I was cuddling my tiny, fragile-seeming newborn, still just days old.


[1] I came across this idea in a blog post and love it – it has become incorporated into my own spiritual philosophy. I regret I cannot credit the woman who introduced me to the idea – her blog post is lost to me in a long trail of cyberspace history…

​As a child, I loved Christmas. I still do. I loved setting up the nativity scene, all figures – human, animal, and angelic - centered around the newborn.  I loved gathering as a family around the tree on Christmas Eve to hear my dad read a nativity story from the Bible. For me, the feelings of this holiday: excitement, anticipation, awe - have always been akin to the way I feel about birth.
 
​Then as an adult I learned that midwinter has long been associated with birth and birth legend, complete with deities and celestial wonders – in fact, because of this, in some cultures, solstice has been called Mother’s Night.[1]

What a beautiful season for my own birthing time!
 
I realized that one of the reasons for the mass emotional resonance Christmas has, is that, perhaps, deep down we are recognizing the specialness of every child born when we celebrate this sacred birth - a celebration of the inherent worth and dignity of each of us.

[1] Llewellyn’s Sabbat Essentials: Yule: Rituals, Recipes, and Lore for the Winter Solstice, Llewellyn Publications, Woodbury, MN, 2015.

When you’re expecting, hopes and fears are written larger than life!
 
I wrestled with the contrast between the cherished, celebrated newborn and the isolation and hardship the human journey can lead through:  
because of my decision to have a baby, 50 years from now there could be a homeless man, perhaps mentally ill and estranged from his family. Or 80 years down the road, an isolated woman lying in a hospital bed…
 
It can break a new mom’s heart to think that I won’t always be there to help my child in her times of need. But that’s as it should be – every child needs their village, all through their life. But there are things I can do…

• I can give her the loving foundation that will help her all her life.
• I can help create the world that I want my child to be born into –

a world where our vulnerable times are met with loving support by those around us.

• I am surrounded by other mothers’ children (of all ages) everywhere I go – I can treat them with

the gentleness and compassion that a loving mother hopes for their child to be met with in the world.
I can honour the essential spirit in each of us, that shines so clearly at our births.
Through my fears, I met the comfort and practical love of the universal mother.
 
Anne Lamott writes, in her book, Operating Instructions: A Journal of My Son’s First Year, “it helps me beyond words to look at myself through the eyes of Mary, totally adoring and gentle, instead of through the critical eyes of the men at the Belvedere Tennis Club, which is how I’ve looked at myself nearly all my life. I don’t think the men at the Belvedere Tennis Club would look at this big exhausted, weepy, baggy, mentally-ill, cellulite unit we call Anne Lamott and see a beautiful, precious, heroic, child. But Mary does.”

One of the spiritual experiences I had while expecting was how connected I felt to the world around me – to the generations, especially to the birthing experiences of my foremothers; and I experienced my body as a connected part of nature – just another mammal - in gestation, birth in my snug den, snuggling and nursing my little cub, and watching her grow! It felt so fitting that she was kindled in the springtime, when Mother Earth is vibrant with fertility.
It’s amazing how the process just flows along, beyond my own volition, like watching a garden grow through the summer.
It was amazing to experience my body and hers spiral apart, in that ancient dance our bodies naturally knew so well.
 
Nature is the foundation of my spirituality, so it was very special to experience myself as part of nature in this new way.  

Archetypal Journey
​
While I was pregnant, for the first time I noticed how strange it is to call newborns “the new arrival.” I mean, who are we kidding? They’ve been here all along! (pats belly) It’s not as if they had to pack a bag for the flight (as sweet as the “stork” idea is).
I preferred to think of birth as a baby’s transformation from water creature to earth creature – taking its first breath.
 
But the idea of a journey turned out to be a powerful metaphor for me in birth. I saw a sea before me, with a distant shore, which I crossed over to in a little personal sized boat - to return together with the baby. The birthing waves carried us onward, along with a fair bit of rowing by me! It was archetypal – a hero’s journey, with no guarantee of a safe return for either of us.
 
It was an identity-transforming journey, in which I started to identify with the role of Mother - I learned new depths of my determination and resolve, and new heights of gratitude for the grace
that allowed me to bring my baby safely home.
 
Does it seem strange to you that I speak in such epic, legendary terms of an ordinary event that happens every day? But this is one of life’s beautiful mysteries – each of our lives, from birth to death – is ordinary… and legendary!

Every Night a Holy Night, by Wendy Luella Perkins,
​was a theme song for me during my approach to motherhood – it fit so well with the spirit of the advent season! 
​

It was a cold September day. I had been running around visiting friends, and finishing up loose ends hoping that you would arrive soon (and that I would no longer be pregnant) After two or more weeks of false labor and constant contractions, on the evening of September 29th, I began to feel a little different. My contractions were coming and going, but for weeks this was happening so why pay attention to them now. Plus now I had some work to finish up before you arrived.
 
I couldn’t get to sleep, maybe this was the real thing (maybe it was the coffee I indulged in at 6:00pm - bad idea) So I began a night by myself, rocking back and forth on the ball and feeling each wave come and go. I didn’t want to wake my husband because we’d already had one or two false alarms. After a couple of hours, I was convinced, this was it. I pulled out my “what to do in labor list” and began checking of the things. Music. “Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs.” Rest.
 
Around 3am I woke up my husband and called our doula Vanessa. “Try to sleep” She said. So I lay there, unable to rest, but excited at what was finally happening. With appointments scheduled the next morning, I began excitedly packing only to be told not to come to see my doctor if I was truly in labor, but to wait and go to the hospital when it was time.
 
So, we waited. I tried to take a nap after a sleepless night and as I “napped” it seemed my contractions got further and further apart. Feeling defeated again, maybe this wasn’t it.
So we turned to the humor of old TV episodes and continued to hope that the baby would be coming today.
 .

​Contractions continued and it was time to call Vanessa again. In our living room, the three of us sat, silence falling at each contraction and good conversation (plus Netflix) in between.
They continued past lunch, we tried everything to get them closer together but they stayed 5 minutes apart all afternoon. Around 4:00pm we decided they were close enough to leave before rush hour. It became so exciting; we were going to have our baby!
 
When we arrived I insisted on the stairs. So I climbed up, so I could have my baby. Once there, things were still going strong, but only to find out.. 2cm, still (after a month) the nurse left and I burst into tears, we had to go back home. No baby tonight.
 
So we made our way back, now already 8:00pm, stopped for a burger and back to sitting and waiting. It was time to try and sleep again. In and out with contractions, by 3 or 4am, I was up again.
 
In the darkness, Vanessa and I talked. (She truly was our life saver, finding random blankets from our house and staying the night with us.) Day 2.5 of labor was upon us. I just continued to ride each contraction, still 5-6 minutes apart.

​Stairs, the ball, squats, we had done it all. By mid-morning I decided I really wanted to clean the kitchen and I wanted to bake a cake. I was tired of all this. We woke up my husband to bring us cake mix and Starbucks.
 
We continued to labour on after he left. And this is where time stopped. I truly believe I was finally in active labor. I was completely mindless and remember very little about what happened from here on out, all I know was each wave and each contraction was intense but bringing me closer to baby.

​

I wasn’t convinced, I wanted to stay in my bedroom doing those motions until he or she arrived, but we packed up, leaving my PSL behind and we left. Yes! This was it! Active labor for sure! (Even Vanessa thinks so!) Contractions 2 minutes apart, this is it! Walking those stairs at the Royal Alex again, only making everyone more sure this baby was coming! Into assessment and no beds around for us this time, so we continued in the waiting room. We were making our way to the same bed as yesterday and we were sure it was going to be time.
 
2 cm… again.
 
I had never felt more defeated in my life. I was sure I was in active labor. “Come back when they are closer together” the nurse said.
 
Although on my perfectly crafted birth plan was to have no augmentation to my labor this was getting into day 3 (I didn’t ask for that in my plan either) I asked for my membrane sweep. There was no one who could do this at the hospital, so they told me I could go to my doctor to have one done or go home.
 
A much needed stop in the Lois Hole Healing Gardens, to cry and labor outside on the most beautiful day of the fall, and decide.
Doctor Mayo, my OB, had an office across the street; it was approaching 5pm so I needed to make my decision. Off we went, and even though it was only across the street it took us a half hour to get there, contracting in the parkades and the streets.
 
Luckily, he would see me. I tried to keep my contractions minimal in the waiting room, people quietly whispering around me and speculating whether or not I was in labour.
When he walks in to see me, he stops, looks and says “you’re in labor!” He tells me I should go back to the hospital and have this baby. I don’t want the Pitocin he suggests, but with a phone call we are on our way back to the hospital to be admitted. He wishes me luck as he wasn’t on call that evening and tells me I will have the baby tonight! We begin the “long” trek back across the street and up those stairs. I resist the stairs but Vanessa cheers me on and up we go.
 
Back in assessment, the nurses say that I will not be going across the hall like I’d thought, I was asked again to get Pitocin and I declined, so I am tucked in the farthest bed and I continue to labor. Was I not being moved because there is no room? Or was it because I will not accept pitocin? We will never know. “Fine!” I said “I will get to 10 cm and have this baby here!” 
Clearly the sweep with the doctor had worked; I was now 1 minute apart and so intense. I moaned into my pillow for a few hours. “Why are you using the pillow?” Vanessa said, “They will get rid of your faster if you just let it out!” So she took it away and I’m sure I traumatized every pregnant woman in there, but I didn’t care. My natural birth was going great, even though we were officially more than 3 days in.
 
I started to make a mess of things, so they finally sent me to the other side. I had always heard you had to go from assessment to L&D in a wheelchair, many women protest this, but I was welcoming it with open arms. The nurse came to get me… no wheel chair and she was a very fast walker. It felt like the longest walk of my life, even though it was only down the hall, but I remember walking through the contractions, just to get to my room.
 
Finally there, I don’t remember much of the room, except being very excited it had a Lois Hole Garden view. This is where I would have my baby. It was already after 7:00pm on October 1st. Nurse Laura was the one who would be with me and she was instantly amazing. She so carefully reviewed my birth plan, let me know everything I could expect to be done or pressured to be done, and asked questions. She was very deserving of my nurse treat bag!
 
I continued my many positions for hours before we met our sweet doctor for the night. It was time to think about breaking my water. Another augmentation I didn’t want, but had to be done. I was 5-6cm by now and yes, it was time to break my waters!
For hours water poured out! (I had a condition in pregnancy called polyhydramnios) My stomach halved in size and the nurses were obsessing over each contraction and how you could see the body shape of the baby perfectly in my belly.
 
Ball, bed, toilet, shower, repeat.
 
I remember very little from the night, only reminding myself at each contraction “we must be close, only 1 minute long, one more closer.”
 
Another check and I was only 7cm… why! So we continued into the early hours of the morning.
Only to find out upon every check, 9.5cm… 9.5 cm for over 8 hours. What was going on?
“I am pushing him out!” I cry out and the nurses tell me to hold back, it’s not time. How could it not be time, each contraction he was being pushed without my control. Here is the only part of my labor I recall saying “I cannot do this” and Vanessa looking me dead in the eyes, telling me that I can. Hunched over the bed, not truly believing I could and the room a blur I continued on.
At another check and another 9.5cm, it was found that my baby was stuck.
“I can turn him without an epidural” the doctor told me “but I won’t because it’s inhumane and it will hurt.”
 
The decision I never wanted to make was on my plate. I never wanted to face this moment and here it was. I’m 9.5cm, yet feeling so far away. Darting my gaze frantically between Vanessa and my husband, Brant,  throughout contractions, I was searching their eyes for my answer. I knew what I had to do but I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. Even nurse Laura, who had now been with me her entire shift, getting ready to leave, sat at my bedside and assured me I was doing an amazing job and I would have that baby soon.
 
She offered her congrats before heading out and with the strength of my team; it was time for the epidural. Besides all the negatives associated with the epidural for baby, I was also just downright scared to get one. How would I stay still? My contractions were too strong and close, but I just remember staring at Brant through the tears as it was quickly completed.
 
Reprieve and sleep. My head cleared and I could see the time it was. 6am… Friday? This all started on Tuesday! I counted the hours in my head; we were now 56 hours in. Now that I have the epidural and they told me that it’ll relax me enough for that last 0.5 cm, it MUST be soon.
 
Doctor Mayo checked in and told me he was going to be there for the next two days. “I WILL deliver your baby” he said as he left me still at 9.5cm.
 
Later on, still at 9.5 and contractions slowing, it was time for Pitocin. So we played the up and down game of Pitocin and epidural for a few hours. By noon, it was time to push. I remember looking up at the clock as soon as they said I was 10cm, 12:00pm. “Most people push for 2 hours” I thought, “I will have this baby 1:00pm then!” I was so happy.
 
Pushing, pushing, pushing… another look at the clock and it was 1:00pm “Okay, by 2:00pm” More pushing, more hope since he was coming down and the heartbeat was great. After we passed 2:00pm time just didn’t exist anymore. I didn’t care, I just wanted to meet our baby now.
 
Sitting crunched up, pushing every minute for 5 hours, Doctor Mayo was back to check in after ​5:00pm he asked “Can you keep going?” I again searched the faces of Brant and Vanessa, all of us exhausted after almost 4 days of labor, but I said “No I can’t, I’m too tired” He asked me if I wanted the vacuum (a horror a terrible nurse from earlier told me about) Yes, it was time, I wanted to meet our baby.
Once I had confirmed this everything became a flurry. Lights blasted on, more nurses showed up, a resident introduced himself in between my legs, as I was pushing. It was like it was show time! And it was.
 
Doctor Mayo pulled our little baby out so slowly and carefully. “Touch the head!” someone said, when I did I just looked back and Brant and wept. This baby was real and almost here! At some point during all this in burst Nurse Laura “YOU’RE STILL HERE!?” she cried out, 14 hours later she was starting her next shift and finished off what she started with us. After a few more pulls, Doctor Mayo took off the vacuum and said “you push the rest of the way” So I did and I had the ultimate satisfaction of pushing my baby into this world.
 
No one yelled out the gender like I always imagined, I searched for what it might be and I said “a boy!” we were right all along.
 
No skin to skin or cord clamping, because well… after 5.5 long hours, he pooped. In some of my prenatal talks, I remembered someone saying that when they take them to heating table it’s only 10 feet away but it will feel like over 100. And it did. I continued to cry, not just because I wanted to see my baby but also from joy, accomplishment and just knowing he was finally here.
Doctor Mayo quickly explained why we couldn’t do any other things from my birth plan before rushing to another birth. I don’t remember what he said, but I remember he was fantastic.
When they brought him to me, I got my skin to skin and we sat and cried and stared at him, our beautiful boy. I don’t even know how much time passed during those moments, the three of us so close together; it was the most special moment of my life.

Oliver Gray was born on October 2nd, 2015 after over 72 hours of labor at 5:22pm. And he was worth it all.
 
______________________________
 
 
I didn’t get everything I wanted in my birth, in fact I pretty much got everything I didn’t want in regards to my birth plan. But I don’t look back on it with any regret. If I hadn’t taken those steps, Oliver may have taken even longer to arrive. Something could have gone terribly wrong and happened to me, or worse to him.
I planned one thing no one really knew about, knowing I needed to be flexible no matter what. My flexibility is what got him here and I’m so proud of this birth story. These were some of the most intense moments of my life and he stayed my little champion the whole time, just like he is now. I would do it all again for him and wouldn’t change a thing.

Special thank you for sharing your birth story with us.  
​Past Full Circle client, Liz Driedger  whose doula was Vanessa. 

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Adulting. Ugh. I love that this is now a thing. There are various definitions of “adulting” ranging from having a job or paying bills to making life changing decisions and caring for little humans. I feel that in my 20 years of being in the “legal age” bracket, I can honestly say that I've never really felt the harrows of adulting until this past year... making major changes that effect more than my singular, seemingly insignificant self. I'm not saying that having children is what truly makes you an adult, I'm just saying that for me, life was life and I never really did much to change things. Stuff happened and I rolled with it. That was me. That was it. But these days, there is decision making left and right and up and down! Sugar or sweetener, dayhome or daycare or why am I even working, cereal or toast, shower or dry shampoo (again), 21-day Fix or all of the chocolate, roman blinds or curtains, quit my job or apply for a new one, vasectomy or birth control, go to bed at a reasonable hour or Netflix it up when the kids go to bed? The struggle is real. Some choices, ya know, not so difficult. But some are really ones that I never in my wildest dreams thought would be things I would be thinking about. But I do. Daily. Adulting. Ugh.

And now that I'm this "adult", I have to actually deal with change. What's best for me? What's best for them? I have to help my children deal with change. Transitions. Bite me. After moving in September, the dust is finally starting to settle. There is a semblance of order to our lives. There are nights of almost complete sleep. Almost. Yeah, I'm exaggerating. They aren't very close to almost yet... but the rest of it is there. Routine and consistency and not-McDonald's every second night. This is my definition of success. Everyone tells me that the sleep will come and holy hell am I ever betting on that. With all of this responsibility for change and dealing with the fallout, I am very glad that I am an adult... so I can buy and drink all the wine. 


There are moments when the thoughts creep in. “I remember when...” and “Wouldn't it be great if...” and “I really miss...” We had our favourite restaurants that we went to whenever, we bought all the things we wanted, we went to see every movie and every band that came to town and I never ever cared if a show was on a weekday. I went to the gym! I actually cooked without a crockpot! I wore make up and owned more than one real bra! But I didn't have impromptu dance parties before dinner. I didn't get to watch anyone learn to read or write or see them make friends. I didn't get snotty face prints on my pants because someone loved me so much that they needed to hug me so hard one more time before I went to work. These are the things that make adulting much less daunting. If this is where I get to adult, I can deal with that. As far as choices go, I choose here. I choose now.

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Chrissy Boone is a Labour Doula with Full Circle Birth Collective and has supported children and families for many years in the human services field. To learn more about Chrissy, click here.

​When I tell people I’m working towards being able to teach Sacred Pregnancy retreats, I’m usually met with the look – the one full of skepticism, the one that says “Oh… you’re one of "those" doulas, with their hippy woo-woo science! Are you a Sherpa too?!”

Common misconception – I’m not a Sherpa or a three month old baby! However, I am pretty passionate about women experiencing the kind of birth day they envision, and that just might mean taking the time to connect to yourself and the little one your body is working so hard to help grow.

I know I’m guilty of this – I rarely take time to address, honor or mark the milestones in my life. Sometimes, this takes a toll on me! It can feel like all of these important events are flying by and my journey seems to be going far too quickly. Sacred Pregnancy is about slowing down, appreciating the little (and big!) changes your body is going through and honoring this transitional time in your life.

​A Sacred Pregnancy retreat will teach you to take time for yourself – even if it’s 5 minutes a day. It outlines the importance of meditation and journaling to connect to yourself and your baby and create a sacred space for reflection. It will also encourage you to take a serious look at the expectations you hold surrounding pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Women will get all kinds of pregnancy and birth messages from the time they are a young girl until the step onto the pregnancy, birth and motherhood path. Are the expectations you have realistic? Are they serving you in a positive way? Some of these messages are healthy, good and empowering, but most from society at large are not. It’s important for us to look at our expectations and where they come from, or at least where do we think they came from. It’s also especially important to know that every birth story is a normal birth story. It’s your journey; it’s your life lesson.

Sacred Pregnancy is connection, is facing and forgiving your fears, is honoring the body that is growing an extension of love, is sisterhood. It’s growing your circle. It’s learning to change – because you are changing! Motherhood is a journey and pregnancy is just the beginning – so slow down when you can, you deserve to celebrate it!